25 Signs You Went To An All-Girls Catholic School

I edited one of my favorite lists (x) and added a few of my own.

1.  Adjusting to college life is a difficult transition for most people, but you actually had to start re-learning all of your grooming habits…You secretly miss having your clothes picked out for you 5 out of 7 days in the week. Life was easier when you were forced to wear a uniform…

2.  You’re still getting use to the fact that there isn’t just food everywhere, all the time. Also that gorging yourself all day every day isn’t normal either.

3.  When someone says “peace be with you” you say “also with you” without thinking. 

4.  Going to an all-girls school helped you focus on school and made you more intelligent, but it also made you a bit desperate and socially awkward around boys. 

5.  The sex-ed classes you had were just informative enough to explain where babies come from, but not helpful when it came to actually interacting with boys.  (And they mostly consisted of slides of diseased, STD-ridden genitals..)

6.You still remember the names of all the girls you went to school with…their younger and older sisters who went to your school too…and their hot brothers who went to the all-boys Catholic schools.

7.  You timed when you got up for confessional so you would get a visiting priest from another church and not one you knew.

8.  You were taught this strange mix of unintentional feminism with strong Catholic values, something we know does not easily mix. So while we were learning to be leaders and take pride in being intelligent, capable women, we were also taking “Catholic Marriage” theology classes on how to maintain a happy, heterosexual union.

9.  You love nuns. They are stern on the outside, but on the inside they are adorable, compassionate softies, and are some of the sweetest women you’ve ever met.

10.  You sang. A LOT. 

11.  The added bonus to being involved in theatre and chorus was boys from your school’s brother-school would come over after the final bell to practice. And the main bathroom would be hazy with perfume and packed with giddy girls from 3:00-3:15 changing their outfits and putting on makeup.

12.  Your fundraising skills are the bomb. You pimped out everything from chocolates and magazine subscriptions to wrapping paper and raffle tickets every year. 

13.  Your non-Catholic friends think your mass rituals, like the sign of the cross, the chanting, ashes and incense are strange and complicated.

14.  Your level of badass-ery was based on how much you deviated from the dress code. Colored socks under your shoes and leggings under your skirt? Uggs and flats with your uniform? Scarves and J.Crew cardigans instead of the uniform sweater? Staples of the good-Catholic-girl-gone-bad rebel.

15.  You know what “leave room for the Holy Spirit means.” One foot apart with only arms touching is the only way to slow dance and keep Jesus happy.

16.  You had mass at least once every week, and more times if their were religious holidays.

17.  You used only get up ten minutes before leaving your house. All you had to do was put on a uniform and eat breakfast.

18.  There was always one girl in your class that would get pregnant before the end of senior year. And once someone found out the secret, the rumor would spread by second period.

19.  The stereotype that nobody tries with appearances is actually pretty true, because there aren’t any boys…but the stereotype that everybody is straight because they’re Catholic and actually care that there aren’t boys, isn’t.

20.  You think it’s weird to NOT start EVERYTHING with prayer. The morning begins with a prayer on the loudspeaker before announcements, and continues through the day at the beginning of, you know, every class.

21.  You had weird traditions, like having one day of the year where there were shortened classes and the day was devoted to a do-or-die event, where the freshmen, sophomores, juniors and seniors would battle each other in a series of skits and dancing/singing routines…and everybody would lose their shit over it.

22.  You were addressed, at large, as “LADIES” in a really demanding and condescending tone, especially when you were in trouble.

23.  You went to school with an…interesting mix of people. There are hardcore Catholics and rich daddy’s girls who were like, the only ones who could really afford private school. There are the ones who were utterly obsessed with school work and grades because they had to live up to their parent’s wealth and success or something, and the people who would rather be in the eighth circle of hell than be in an all-girls Catholic school for another day.

24.  If you want to cause mass hysteria, bring in one of the following things: pizza, cupcakes, a puppy, or a boy.

25.  You talk more about your school experience than anyone else who went to public school. You will always say that you got a thorough education, and that if you had to do it over you wouldn’t change a thing.